Do as I Do3/5/2024 Photo by Vlad Tchompalov on Unsplash Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6 ESV
Proverbs 22:6 is a principle not a promise. It’s not guaranteed that a child who was “raised right” will grow up to follow the Lord. We know this from experience. As a pastor, I can’t tell you how many times a parent or grandparent grieved by their child, or grandchild’s actions have come to me and said, “This is not the way they were raised!” And let me tell you I believe them! Many of those who have come to me and have said this are God loving and fearing people. No parent is perfect. All children are born with a sin nature (Romans 5:12). Children will grow up an make their own choices, the best we can do is to teach them the gospel from God’s word and pray that the Lord would take their hearts of stone and turn them into a heart of flesh (Ezekiel 36:26). A disciple is not above his teacher, but everyone when he is fully trained will be like his teacher. Luke 6:40 ESV Several years ago, I was looking at some football pictures of me and my brothers. One noticeable thing was that when we stood on the sideline, we all stood the exact same way. We found a picture of my dad when he was in high school playing football and sure enough, he was standing the exact same way. That’s not all that crazy. It’s actually the simple concept of “monkey see, monkey do.” Children learn by watching their parents. They watch them do EVERYTHING even how they stand! Your children are watching you, what do they see? Do they see their dad studying God’s word or studying football stats for fantasy football? Do they see their mom praying with and encouraging other moms, or do they see them gossiping about others? Do they see their parents make plans around church or do they see their parents make plans to miss church? As we think about these questions let me also encourage you to never say “Do as I say not as I do.” That is one of the stupidest things you can tell your child. Live the way you want your kids to live. If you’re doing something you don’t want your kids to do…STOP DOING IT! Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him. Proverbs 13:24 ESV Discipline is a necessary good. In fact, true love for your child demands discipline. There is a way to show grace, mercy, and forgiveness while also practicing discipline. To do so, parents must resist the urge in the heat of the moment to let their own emotions get the best of them. Sometimes it’s probably best to send them to their rooms while you take a moment to cool down and collect yourself. “A man of wrath stirs up strife, and one given to anger causes much transgression” (Proverbs 29:22 ESV). There is a big difference between wrath and discipline. God does not pour out His wrath on believers (Romans 8:1) but in love He disciplines them (Proverbs 3:11-12). If you let your emotions get the best of you in the moment, you’re not really disciplining them as much as pouring out your wrath on them. Don’t be afraid to bust their rear ends, ground them, or take away privileges, just make sure you do so with all self-control, explaining to your child that the discipline comes from an abundance of love and care for their well-being. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:16 ESV Like I said above, no parent is perfect! You have and you will make mistakes. The gospel teaches us that we are not perfect and because of that Jesus had to die in our place to pay for our sins. “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9 ESV). Confess your failings and shortcomings as a parent and then draw near to the throne of grace. Practicing this kind of humility and dependence upon the Lord is good for your soul and its good for your children to see as well. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. Deuteronomy 6:6-7 ESV
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Leave a Reply.AuthorTrevor Williams is the Lead Pastor at Ector Baptist Church in Ector, TX. Archives
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